Ten Valentine’s Day Gift Ideas In A Recession

A freelance article I wrote recently posted here: Ask Matt and Tamsen

Ten creative and heartfelt ways to celebrate Valentine's Day in style! And these are not gender-specific.

10. A Letter from Future You – Tell your partner "I’m happy with where we are" by writing a letter sent back from yourself in the future: the things you've enjoyed, what life is like (have fun with this one) and how you still feel. It’s personal, inexpensive and not without sentiment.

9. A Mini MP3 Player – Load it up with your partner's favorite songs. Yep, a hi-tech mix tape but still sentimental. It’s re-usable so it’s green!

8. Dinner Chez Vous – A nice meal made by you, with candles and an inexpensive bottle of wine (plenty are rated 87 points and higher for under $20) says "I care." And "I hate crowds, too." Dinner for two, no matter where you go, is an opportunity for intimacy.

7. A Trip to Victoria’s Secret – Let’s face it. Asking a man to purchase lingerie or women's shoes is like asking the mechanically uninclined to buy car parts. So take him to VS and let him help you pick out the perfect items. And a quick web search can score you some coupons: like SPRING10 gets you $15 off $100.

6. A Night Alone - Get a sitter if you need one for your kids or your roommates, and just find some quality time together. No work, no distractions, and no regrettably big bills when it’s over. These are the times you’ll remember; not the trinkets. A meal at a nice spot off the beaten track and at an off-peak time will provide you the best chances for quiet time. Otherwise, see number 8.

5. Digital Picture Frame - Load it up with your personal selection of digital photos. They’re not expensive and you can select the memories. Some offer the ability to load MP3s so you could add a soundtrack and even record a few personal messages. Just be careful if they’re taking it to work!

4. Spend the Day Together – This may sound obvious or easy, but when’s the last time you both took off a weekday to just hang out together? There are a billion things you can do that don’t cost a lot of money – museums, parks, libraries, malls, movies - do whatever you both enjoy during the day, when everyone else is piling into the restaurant waiting areas that night, looking at their watches instead of each other.

3. Donate – Take what you would have normally spent on your Valentine’s Day evening/gifts and make a donation together. There is always someone who needs help. And it will be another sharing the love moment that neither of you will forget.

2. The Ultimate Personal Gift – nothing says “I love you” more than a personally written song, poem, note, photo or drawing. We’re all creative beings so dig deep down and you’ll find something. As long as it is expressive and honest, it’s a win. And humor is fine if you have difficulty with the prose, mush or can’t master a stick figure. And every computer these days comes with the tools to create!

1. Dinner Party: Potluck – What?! Personally, I think the best way to spend Valentine’s Day is with your single friends. Holidays are depressing enough for many; make this one inclusive! What better way to share the love?

In This Economy…Bite Me

Is it just me, or are we blaming everything on the economy?

It’s bad enough that employers take advantage of people during this time with a virtual license to screw – kind of like we did to ourselves in the last real estate boom. Seven-figure-income earners, who can certainly weather a storm like this, make the bold decisions to stop hiring, cut staff, freeze pay, enforce furloughs, and expect employees to be grateful simply for the employment.

Many states like mine (Maryland) hire employees at will, meaning employers can eliminate anyone’s position (that isn’t under a contract) on a whim. And if you want your severance pay you just have to sign here and agree to leave (no one was fired), not sue anyone, and won’t work for any competitors.

Bite me.

Of course pointing any of this out while you’re still employed could be career-ending, so don’t try this at work.

And don’t get me wrong. There are many people truly suffering, or have been blind-sided (often unfairly) and are just trying to make ends meet. I’ve been laid off a few times and it sucks. Even when it isn’t your fault, it’s a betrayal and total blow to your psyche.

If you’re trying to retire and banked on stocks and your 401K, like we’ve all been told to do for eons, my heart truly goes out to you. But for many of us, it’s the idea of losing your job or your income.

A lot of us are suffering losses that are only on paper (stocks are down, 401K is in the tank, your overpriced house is under market value) – but the losses aren’t realized unless you trade those stocks, cash in your 401K or try to sell your house. Otherwise, in time, theoretically they’ll all recover and continue to rise in value. Hence, no real loss.

But it’s beyond the unemployment, the workplace, the banks and financial theory (which I believe is predicated upon keeping fat, rich, white people fat and rich – they’ll be white no matter how much money they make). It’s the constant bombardment of the same message, without anything new to offer.

The media (left-leaning elite liberal or fair-and-balanced-right wing) is hoping this "story" lasts longer than Octomom’s 15 minutes (which is up to about 492 hours, and that's just on television). Honestly, I think we’ll be out of the recession, through another golden era and into a new recession before we’ve heard the end of that family.

At least I haven’t heard “from Wall Street to Main Street” today.

The ECONOMY, if we’re all honest here, is something most of us don’t really understand. We understand our personal economy: what’s in my checkbook, how much do I owe, and that I live paycheck to paycheck, or maybe scam to scam, or on Daddy’s trust fund (turns out Daddy in many cases was just other people’s money).

But it’s in or on everything – news, commercials, radio, print, billboards, graffiti…it’s even making it into the scripts of sit-coms and television dramas. And it's non-stop. It is also, quite conveniently for some, the ultimate scapegoat:

At work…
--Johnson, we have to let you go. It’s the economy.

--But, sir, our stock is up and my team grew our core revenue 12%.

--OK, it’s your hair and I never liked you. Tah tah.

On the highway…
--License and registration. Do you realize how fast you were going, sir?

--I’m sorry, officer. I just can’t pay attention to things like speed-limit signs, school zones or the safety of others. You know, in this economy…

Even at home…
--Jasmine, why haven’t you finished your math homework? It’s time for bed.

--Well, mom, you know, it all seems so pointless, in this economy. What will be left for me when I graduate? Maybe I should just get a job now before you and daddy piss everything away. I can always go back to the third grade later, right?

OK, Jasmine actually has a point. For now, I’d just really love one day without hearing “stimulus package” innuendo or the actual word “economy”.

Last one, I promise…
--Mark, were you just kissing that other woman? Have you lost your freakin’ mind?!

--Come on, Peggy. Since the firm shut down, I’ve been adrift. I’ve lost my masculinity, my self-esteem, my edge, my moral compass. In these economic times, I feel totally emasculated.

--Moral compass? You were an investment banker.

--Point taken. But you do understand, don’t you?...Is that loaded?