Outdated Euphemisms

When I go this long without writing, I feel compelled to put up something just to prove I'm still alive. Today, I'm having fun with euphemisms; not to be confused with gravestone epitaphs ("Here lies...") which could be fun, too. I hope you enjoy them.

Outdated Euphemisms

Old School	New Era
Accountability	Bailout
Dear John	L8r
Fired/Laid off/Downsized	Executive bonus secured
It’s all good	Not unemployed
Off the chain/hook/hizzle	Inaugural
Props	R-E-S-P-E-C-T (old is new again)
Sign here on the dotted line	Bend over
Torture/Water boarding	Anything out of Ann Colter’s mouth
Viagra	Economic stimulus
You people	Us
Your place or mine?	Text me

And just for fun...

Sex Metaphors

Then (Baseball)	Now (Hockey)
First Base	Faceoff
Second Base	Power Play
Third Base	In the Crease
Home Run	Goooooaaaaal!
Grand Slam	Hat Trick
Strikeout	Penalty Box
Pitcher/Catcher	Grinder/Duster
Switch-hitter	Zamboni
Scored	Scored

I'm sure we could add to this all year - your comments are welcome!